If You Want to Make Your Story Better, Read It To Someone

Sorry for the lack of posts, but I've spent so much time getting my garden ready for summer, I haven't had time to post -- even though I have plenty to post about.
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One piece of advice you hear from agents and writers alike is that you should always read your work out loud to yourself. This gives your ear a chance to catch mistakes and pacing problems that your eyes might miss. Sound advice. But here’s a suggestion to make that advice even better.

Read the text out loud to someone else.

The previous sentence may have caused more than a few skipped heartbeats among the more bashful of writers out there. It’s hard enough handing your baby over to someone who’ll read it in silence. Trust me, I understand. But I cannot overstate the power of this technique.

Some critique groups operate by having everyone send in their submissions ahead of time, so that each member has a chance to critique the work prior to the meeting, saving the meeting for the actual discussions and arguments. My local critique group does things a bit differently. There are no pre-submissions. We show up and read our pages out loud. We often provide hard copies so that the group can read along and mark up the pages with comments as they wish, but many of the group members close their eyes and focus on their initial reactions to the words.

And one thing I’ve learned is that no matter how clever your words looked on paper, or sounded when you read them out loud to yourself, you’ll be stunned by their apparent lameness when you read them to someone else. The parts of your chapter that need work will stand out like spaghetti stains on a white shirt. Flabby passages will sear your eyeballs and make you wonder why you ever thought you could write. Most of the time, you’ll find far more problems with your work than your critique partners ever will.

Reading out loud also makes it easier for your partners to spot pacing problems. As readers, we’re used to skimming over sections of a story that don’t hold our attention—even if we’re not always aware we’re doing it. But when we listen to a story, scenes that drag stick out like a sore thumb. Try listening to a book on tape sometime and you’ll see what I mean.

I remember listening to a chapter at my critique group a few months ago that had a slow beginning. When I read back over the hard copy to mark the offending pages, I was shocked to discover that the boring section was only two paragraphs long. It had only seemed liked two pages when I was listening.

So if you really want your words to shine, force yourself to read them to someone else. You might be embarrassed, but you’ll be glad you did.

The Insecure Writer and Deciding Whether to Self-Publish

Today is May's contribution to Alex Cavanaugh's Insecure Writers Support Group.


Why am I an Insecure Writer this month?

Because I don’t know which route I’m going to take—traditional or self-publishing.

Now it might seem I’m jumping the gun here a bit, especially when you consider I’ve only recently begun working on my first potentially publishable manuscript. Even if my productivity were to suddenly skyrocket, it will be at least a year before the story is polished enough for publication. And by that time, the publishing world may have changed so much that any decisions I make now might be irrelevant.

So why worry about it now? Because I’m wrestling with a few questions about my story—questions whose answers may depend upon the route I take to publication. .I know what my story is about and I know the setting (magic, castles, humorous characters, etc.), but I still haven’t decided on the age of the main character. Right now, he’s fourteen, making it an upper MG story, which means I need to write with an upper MG style. I have no problem with that, but I can also envision the story with an older MC, one who has recently graduated from college. In that case, the style would be different—something like Harry Potter meets The Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy. (If you haven’t read either one of these series, you should.) As it stands right now, I haven’t decided which style plays more to my strengths, or which style would be more interesting to potential readers.

Now I could just let these things sort themselves out as I write, but I worry that the correct choice may ultimately depend upon the method I choose for publication. Most of the self-published books I find on Amazon involve older characters*, whereas most of the MG stories are traditionally published. From what I understand, libraries and parents are less inclined to buy self-published MG books, unless from an established author, since there are no assurances a self-published book wouldn’t be full of profanity or other topics unsuitable for MG readers. In other words, if I write the story with a MG MC, I better hope I find an agent and publisher. Then again, I've heard many adults enjoy reading MG books, so who knows?

Perhaps I’m getting the cart before the horse and should just write whatever version of the story most appeals to me and worry about the publishing route later. But that’s what being an Insecure Writer is all about, right?.

If anyone has any thoughts on the subject, I’d love to hear them.

*BTW, I’ve ignored YA in this analysis, since I suspect I’d be terrible at writing YA.

Sacrifices in Writing

I stopped by the KillZone the other day and read a post by James Scott Bell on self-publishing. And one of the things he discussed was how writers needed to treat writing like a sacrifice.

“Be prepared to give some things up (TV is a jealous mistress, too) in order to find time to write.”

And that prompted me to compile a list of the things I’ve given up the past couple of years to pursue my dream of being a published writer.

Television. I used to watch a lot of TV. Now I watch one DVR’ed show a night, together with my wife.

Video games. I was addicted to them several years ago, but that was before being bitten by the writing bug. The only time I play these days is online with my brother on Saturday nights – although I have been known to sneak in a few minutes of Minecraft whenever I’m stuck in the middle of writing a scene. I used to tell my kids which video games were best. Now they tell me.

Sleep. I’m sure all writers sacrifice sleep for their art. Sometimes my only chance to write comes when everyone else is in bed. Unfortunately, I’ve discovered my muse is usually asleep then too.

The Internet. Visiting websites having nothing to do with writing doesn't happen much anymore.

Gardening. I used to plan each year’s flower garden beginning in February and keep tweaking the design until it was time to plant in May. Now I plant as little as possible as quickly as possible and hope everything turns out okay as the summer progresses.

Free time. By definition, free time means writing time, so it's no longer free.


So what about you?  What have you given up for writing?

Sharing is Caring: The Liebster Award

Thanks to Cherie Colyer for nominating me for the Liebster award.  I'm honored!  But with great honor comes great responsibility, so here we go...

First, eleven things about me:

1. I have to wear SPF 100 or I'll burn in no time.
2. I’m a research chemist by day and part-time writer by night.
3. I love magic, old castles, and Britain. I especially love magic when it occurs within old castles in Britain.
4. I rarely watch television in real time, preferring to DVR them.
5. My memory for names and faces is abysmal. Rarely can I make it through a movie without having to ask my wife who’s who at least once.
6. Autumn is my favorite time of year. Hands down.
7. I’m the one responsible for getting my kids hooked on video games.
8. I would love to retire in Britain someday. The castles and history alone would make it worthwhile.
9. I've visited every state in the continental United States except for two.  Unfortunately, I don't remember which two they are.
10, Our family is about to get a new cat.
11. My longest run ever (I used to jog) was 9 miles.


Now my answers to the eleven questions posed by Cherie

1. What do you like best about blogging?  Meeting other writers
2. Mountains or ocean? Ocean, especially odd since I don’t swim.
3. Favorite authors? Clarke, Asimov, Sanderson
4. Are you an outliner or a panster? Outliner, although as soon as I begin writing, I keep coming up with ideas that require constant changes to the outline. Guess I’m a plotser.
5. Where do you find your inspiration? Movies and books.
6. What fictional world would you like to visit? The Harry Potter world, of course.
7. KFC or Popeye’s? KFC, Never tried Popeye’s
8. Are there any books you won’t read? Boring ones. Also books with too much showing.
9. Name three people (living or dead) you’d like to meet? Linus Pauling, J.K. Rowling,
10. Do you have any advice for fellow bloggers? Post on a regular schedule – unlike me – but don’t let it interfere with your writing.
11. Is this your first Liebster award? No 


Here are the bloggers I would liked to nominate for this award.

Margo Berendsen

Sarah Mccabe

Rachael Featherstone

Celeste Holloway

Donna Weaver

Ali Cross

Molly Greene

Sher Hart

Veronica Sicoe

Camille Picott

Carissa Taylor

Your new questions:

1. How long have you been blogging?

2. How many people in your family?

3. What was your favorite book?

4. Harry Potter or Twilight?

5. Where do you find your inspiration?

6. What fictional world would you like to visit?

7. Hanburger or cheeseburger

8. Cat or dog?

9. Do you believe in magic?

10. What advice would you give new writers?

11. Is this your first Liebster award?

The Liebster Rules:

1. The Liebster Award is given to bloggers by bloggers.

2. Each blogger should post 11 facts about himself / herself.

3. Each blogger should answer the 11 questions that are asked by the nominating blogger.

4. Choose 11 new bloggers to nominate for the Award and link to them in the post.

5. Create 11 new questions for your nominees.

6. Go back to their pages and tell them they've been nominated.

7. No tag backs

If you'd like to participate, feel free to snag the questions and begin your own round of the Liebster Awards!

The Insecure Writer and Changes in the Publishing Industry

Today is April's contribution to Alex Cavanaugh's Insecure Writers Support Group.


What makes me an Insecure Writer this month?

My fear that the world of publishing is changing faster than I can adapt.

We all know the publishing industry is in the midst of change. The rise of self-publishing, the changing roles of agents and editors, the increased competition for the reader's attention. All issues of concern. But I’m not discussing any of these topics today. Today, I'm worried about changes in how story openings should work – at least in the view of agents and editors.

Consider the opening lines from the first Harry Potter book.

 Mr. and Mrs. Dursley, of number four, Privet Drive, were proud to say that they were perfectly normal, thank you very much. They were the last people you’d expect to be involved in anything strange or mysterious, because they just didn’t hold with such nonsense.

Now I happen to love this opening. It shows the author has both a sense of humor and an interesting voice. And it immediately makes me want to know what sort of strange and mysterious event is about to happen, which is exactly what opening lines are supposed to do. But a week ago I ran across a blog post that mentioned this opening and, to my surprise, the blogger seemed dumbfounded that the opening had worked. “There's no action,” the blogger wrote. “No conflict.” Why would anyone read on? And I could only shake my head.

Unfortunately, this isn’t the first time I’ve heard similar views on the subject. From what I unerstand, agents are now telling writers that if there’s no action or conflict at the beginning of a story, then their book stands little chance of getting published. And that worries me.

You see, three years ago, when I first began perusing the blogosphere for advice on writing, one of the first things I learned was that beginnings needed to hook the reader quickly or the author risked losing them. No long descriptions, no weather reports, no boring conversations, etc. Intrigue the reader quickly—that was the trick. And many ways were suggested to accomplish this. Pose an interesting question, show the reader something unusual, foreshadow something mysterious, use humor, begin in media res. And, of course, consider getting conflict on the very first page. All very good ideas. My point is that three years ago, getting conflict on the first page was only one of the ways to hook your readers. Now it sounds as though it’s the required method for hooking your reader -- at least according to the gatekeepers. Makes me wonder if Harry Potter would be published if it came out now.

The problem is, not all stories lend themselves to immediate conflict, which, I suspect, is one reason so many scifi/fantasy stories begin with action filled prologues. And this requirement for immediate conflict is leading to some unfortunate trends in books. Many of the MG fantasies I’ve been reading lately all start out in the same way -- with siblings arguing and sniping at one another in an otherwise boring chapter. The characters may be heading toward a haunted mansion, or a deserted town, or a suspected alien base, but instead of intriguing the reader by foreshadowing the upcoming events, the authors apparently feel obligated to generate artificial conflict by having the characters call each other names for several pages.

If you can begin your story with real conflict that leads to the main plot, then by all means do it. But sticking in artificial (and boring) conflict just to have it present in the first pages leaves me cold.

Sorry. I'm supposed to be talking like an insecure writer. I’ll get off the soapbox now.

Has anyone else noticed trends in books dictated by the new climate in publishing?

You Mean I'm Not Going To Write Any Faster?

After spending the last month working on the first chapter of my new book, I’ve come to the following startling conclusion.

I’m a slow writer.

Well, duh.

Anyone who's been reading this blog regularly knows this. My CPs figured it out a while ago. So did my wife and kids. Even my cats are beginning to catch on. So why do I mention this now? Because I naively thought much of my slowness had to do with being a newbie writer, which meant the writing should go more quickly with the second book.

Nope. Just as slow as before.

I still have to go over scenes again and again, rearranging the sequence of events, changing the scene’s focus, adding or removing characters, and putting in the most basic of details. Scenes don't pour forth from my mind, I have to shake them loose one little piece at a time. I find that slightly depressing, but at least I now understand that this is the way I write. And I'm okay with that. Because I know if I keep plugging away at a scene, it will eventually come together. 

 It's not all bad news, though. I do know I'm avoiding many of the mistakes I made the first time around, so the editing process should go much faster. Or at least that’s the plan. We’ll see.

BTW, I just realized it's been one year since I met my first CP. Thanks for sticking with me, Sher. Drop by her blog and read her reviews and blog tours.

The Urge To Infodump

It’s a very exciting time for me right now. As I mentioned last week, I’ve begun work on another story and my desk is covered with pages of notes on characters, subplots, and world-building details. World-building isn’t something I’ve had to do before. My previous story was fan fiction, and even though that story had all new characters and plotline, it still used someone else’s world. This time, I have to build the world myself.

I’ve been constructing this world in my head for the last six months, filling it with all sorts of interesting details about how it all works and how it will impact the MC. It’s beginning to come together, which makes me happy, but now that I’m writing some of the early chapters, the urge to infodump is growing exponentially and threatening to burst out of my chest. Kinda like that little critter in Alien.

It’s only natural. All these world-building details are burning a hole in my notebook and it’s hard not to want to deliver this information to the reader ASAP. I want the reader to enjoy it as much as I do. But that’s one of those bad habits a writer needs to constantly fight against. I may want the reader to get to know my world quickly, but that’s not what’s best for either the story or the reader—especially if the information is delivered via an infodump.

Infodumps can drag a story to a halt. And even if they’re written in an entertaining way that keeps the story moving forward, there’s still a problem. Releasing information too quickly robs the reader of some of the excitement. In many sci-fi and fantasy stories, half the fun is in discovering the world and how it works. This works best if you dribble out information a little bit at a time and give the reader the chance to wonder why things are as they are. If you dole it all out at once, the reader never has a chance to ask himself why. Why are all the birds in this world red? Why can’t the mage perform magic in the presence of fire? Give the reader a chance to ponder those questions a while before you explain it to him.

It’s okay for your first chapter or two to act as placeholders for your infodumps. Just make sure you move them somewhere else in the story later.

Anyone else have trouble with early infodumps?